Posted on October 28 2016
Announcing: Madden Cutler Robinson 8lbs 1oz! That wasn't something I got to do the day he was born. Instead, my entire family was anxiously waiting for the news of their newest nephew and grandson.
My nurse went out and grabbed my mom. Since Guy was up with Madden in the NICU she wanted someone to be with me in recovery. I was so happy to see my mom. The kindest, sweetest, most supportive person you will ever meet was now by my side. Guy walked in soon after and reassured me that Madden was still alive. They were able to stabilize him but that he was still in critical condition. I would be able to visit him when I felt better but no other visitors were allowed. He left to go relay the news to our family.
Pain medicine makes me really sick so it took me a couple hours to make it up to see him. When I did make it up see him that night, the nurses told us that we weren't allowed to touch him or talk around him. He was considered a "hands off baby" and as such we needed to just "look" at him. There were 3 full time nurses assigned just to him. One of the nurses had been specifically called in from another hospital to watch over him. I thought that was normal for any baby that entered the NICU but soon realized by listening to the nurses his case wasn't normal at all.
I can't remember specifics about the days just after he was born, but I do remember the doctor telling us that the first three days were always the most critical. Most babies will die in those first three days and since he was a boy, born early and had down syndrome the odds were not stacked in his favor. Madden wasn't responding to the treatments like he needed to and he was already on the highest dose of pain medicine allowed. His vitals were all over the place and sometimes it was hard to get him stabilized. The doctors were preparing us for our son to die. They kept telling us if they can't lower the amount of pain meds he is on he will soon become addicted and that we would be dealing with even more problems.
We needed a miracle. We pleaded with our Heavenly Father asking him to let us raise him. We told God that we would take great care of Madden and be his biggest advocate. We knew that Madden's life wasn't in our hands but in the Lords hands and it was "thy will be done".
Prayer is such a powerful thing. Hope is just as powerful. We finally told others about our situation. They joined us in our prayers, and Madden made it past the three day marker. He was able to tolerate the lower doses of pain medicine. We were starting to see our little miracle take place and the joy that we felt was immeasurable.